tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16010478.post115561967518765091..comments2024-03-22T02:57:20.853-07:00Comments on Center of Gravitas: Queen for a DayGayProfhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11289510184782252498noreply@blogger.comBlogger24125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16010478.post-1161284191654787932006-10-19T11:56:00.000-07:002006-10-19T11:56:00.000-07:00Wearing a tiara is fantasy role-play. Since when ...Wearing a tiara is fantasy role-play. Since when is that a bad thing? <BR/><BR/>Do you folks think that one cannot take marriage, love and commitment seriously and still thoroughly enjoy dancing around in a tiara with your friends? <BR/><BR/>My goodness.<BR/><BR/>Hanging out with friends without your s/o, is encouraged during engagement and even after you're married. I surprised you disagree...Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16010478.post-1155854235580232652006-08-17T15:37:00.000-07:002006-08-17T15:37:00.000-07:00I got married almost a year ago. I share your conc...I got married almost a year ago. I share your concerns. What I think is fantastic about marriage is that you make (or I suppose, intend to make) a permanent commitment to another person, that you will make an effort to think well not only about yourself but about this other person. Done right, that's a great commitment to make.<BR/><BR/>But you don't have to get married to make that. Lots of best friends make this commitment, even if it remains unspoken; plenty of romantic relationships make this commitment.<BR/><BR/>I'm ultimately thrilled I got married and anticipate being so, to this same guy, for as long as I live. But I do think he and I think well and communicate well and have worked hard to keep society's idea of what a marriage should look like out of our own daily decision-making. We were also together for five and a half years before we got married (engaged for two of those years).Katehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16995641658376827290noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16010478.post-1155846988574966002006-08-17T13:36:00.000-07:002006-08-17T13:36:00.000-07:00"He constantly told me that I would never find any..."He constantly told me that I would never find anybody as good as him." Uh, that should have been a major, red flag. Alas, love is blind.<BR/><BR/>Falling in love is a chemically-induced ecstasy, and while it feels wonderful, it is a biological trick. The euphoric stage of love lasts about as long as it takes heteros to pop out some kids.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16010478.post-1155839070334547912006-08-17T11:24:00.000-07:002006-08-17T11:24:00.000-07:00I totally get you about the Boston "gruffness."In ...I totally get you about the Boston "gruffness."<BR/><BR/>In California, a person acts as if you're his or her new bestest friend, but looks over your shoulder to see if there's someone more interesting /powerful/beautiful to give attention to.<BR/><BR/>I would move to Boston if it didn't get so damn friggin' cold in the winter!rhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06980768449046443151noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16010478.post-1155834652900973402006-08-17T10:10:00.000-07:002006-08-17T10:10:00.000-07:00Welcome to Boston! I hope the coming year proves v...Welcome to Boston! I hope the coming year proves valuable emotionally and spiritually as well as professionally. Cheers!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16010478.post-1155791214690481042006-08-16T22:06:00.000-07:002006-08-16T22:06:00.000-07:00You'll find your Steve Trevor. I have no doubt.You'll find your Steve Trevor. I have no doubt.Rick Andreolihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11957678580334682653noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16010478.post-1155687461006747522006-08-15T17:17:00.000-07:002006-08-15T17:17:00.000-07:00Hey, I get 1 out of 5 on the Texas checklist - doe...Hey, I get 1 out of 5 on the Texas checklist - does this give me warm welcome in Texas country? <BR/><BR/>Have to say you caught me on a bad day as I like weddings - well not straight weddings, which are part of assembly lines of straight life where everyone works so hard to keep "normal" on the page - and often people are thrust into marriage by society, by parents, by expectations rather than by actually wanting to be together, whether it comes to an unexpected crash 6 months later or not.Elizabeth McClunghttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03627373214555333537noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16010478.post-1155678412461896062006-08-15T14:46:00.000-07:002006-08-15T14:46:00.000-07:00they felt they "should" be married.yes, thank you....<I>they felt they "should" be married.</I><BR/><BR/>yes, thank you. this scares me, specifically because i seem to have been absent that day in Girl Class, and i don't really understand this mentality. this is not to say that i won't ever get married, but i'm certainly not trying to drag my boyfriend there!kate.d.https://www.blogger.com/profile/09967162934828397188noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16010478.post-1155674694571069222006-08-15T13:44:00.000-07:002006-08-15T13:44:00.000-07:00looks like the p.f. chang's in boston to me.and as...looks like the p.f. chang's in boston to me.<BR/><BR/><BR/>and as commodofied as they are, i still love a good wedding.bretthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07144904365156109756noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16010478.post-1155671893536718272006-08-15T12:58:00.000-07:002006-08-15T12:58:00.000-07:00That picture of the bar looks vaguely familiar... ...That picture of the bar looks vaguely familiar... I was in Boston around 2001~2002ish for a short visit and had stopped by this bar/danceclub thingie that had either ice or dry ice as the bar top, which was backlit somehow.<BR/><BR/>I wonder if that is the same place as the subject matter in your pic?<BR/><BR/>As for the marriages... I think the biggest problem is that folks (generally speaking) are much to quick to rush into the venture (especially women who are "watching the clock" as well as thier friends.<BR/><BR/>In short, marriage has become for many... just another commodity of status.Seeker Onoshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14522582813764890364noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16010478.post-1155669358861411672006-08-15T12:15:00.000-07:002006-08-15T12:15:00.000-07:00I was at the "gay bar" (quotations intentional) th...I was at the "gay bar" (quotations intentional) this weekend and counted, like you, at least 3 different bridal parties, looking just as you described. One of them told me for a dollar I could eat the life saver off of her shirt. I said "You do realize this is, or at least used to be, a gay bar, right?"Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16010478.post-1155665628310254002006-08-15T11:13:00.000-07:002006-08-15T11:13:00.000-07:00"He had such an inflated sense of himself. Of cour..."He had such an inflated sense of himself. Of course, we all know that I was the most interesting thing about him."<BR/><BR/>Yes, we do all know that! <BR/><BR/>"We treat the wedding day as if an end point." <BR/><BR/>That's it in a nutshell! As even Diana (a pretty, pretty Princess in a real tiara) came to know, even the most lavish of over-wrought ceremonies don't prevent the palace from tarnishing when the 'happily-ever-after' has very little to do with the real heart of the people involved. <BR/><BR/>CooperAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16010478.post-1155664490036575652006-08-15T10:54:00.000-07:002006-08-15T10:54:00.000-07:00Christopher: You are only the second person to no...<B>Christopher</B>: You are only the second person to notice and/or comment on the song lyrics in a <I>Center of Gravitas</I> post (There are many hidden in different entries).<BR/><BR/>Good show!GayProfhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11289510184782252498noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16010478.post-1155662691408720352006-08-15T10:24:00.000-07:002006-08-15T10:24:00.000-07:00I think that marriage is simply a societal right o...I think that marriage is simply a societal right of passage in America, and that the institution is hurting the country more than helping it.Larryhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18423390372744319739noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16010478.post-1155661597725836402006-08-15T10:06:00.000-07:002006-08-15T10:06:00.000-07:00You cover so many bases here, and yet all I keep w...You cover so many bases here, and yet all I keep wondering was: what was the crappy but once hot spot you went to?<BR/><BR/>(signed, Center-of-Shallowness)Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16010478.post-1155661115961372822006-08-15T09:58:00.000-07:002006-08-15T09:58:00.000-07:00I have to admit that once you made the Loretta Lyn...I have to admit that once you made the Loretta Lynn reference, I was going to agree with virtually anything you had to say today.ChristopherMhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13032361690288998090noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16010478.post-1155659133648037962006-08-15T09:25:00.000-07:002006-08-15T09:25:00.000-07:00I have an almost pathological loathing of weddings...I have an almost pathological loathing of weddings. From brides and grooms (mostly brides) behaving badly and the sheer inconvenience of the amount of time they take up, mixed with the tendency for people who <B>love</B> weddings to ride you if you have the nerve to express anything less than unbridled enthusiasm at the prospect of eating bad chicken at a table with drunken strangers, I've never enjoyed myself at a wedding. <BR/><BR/>So, I hate them, and of course Pete wants a huge one someday.Dorianhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14754097613320749614noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16010478.post-1155656921258364442006-08-15T08:48:00.000-07:002006-08-15T08:48:00.000-07:00Interesting, your take on Texas. It has been my e...Interesting, your take on Texas. It has been my experience with the members of my family (none of whom are evangelical Christian, to my knowledge) that once Texas sucks you in, you're a Texan for life. (It calls to mind that old skit, "We loved it. It was better than Cats." ad nauseum)<BR/>I think the whole point of the tiara is to embarrass the bride in a good-natured way. I did not go the tiara route (not enough Tequila in all of Arizona). I also did not go the route that you describe, spending gazillions on one stupid day where I got to be The Princess. (Actually, by that time I was so over the whole thing, the only thing I cared about was whether the beer and the groom showed, in that order. Cuz I had the beer first.)pacalagahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12498703982601315908noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16010478.post-1155654213206223532006-08-15T08:03:00.000-07:002006-08-15T08:03:00.000-07:00Very good points on marriage! My own pet peeve is...Very good points on marriage! My own pet peeve is the people who go on to think, "Well, now it must be time to make babies," putting no more thought into that than that! Seriously, people do more research before buying a new car.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16010478.post-1155652625177125692006-08-15T07:37:00.000-07:002006-08-15T07:37:00.000-07:00"Sure, they express an astounding gruffness in the..."Sure, they express an astounding gruffness in the first minute and half of conversation."<BR/><BR/>Oh for the love of all that's holy... are you insane?! You are not allowed to tell non-New Englanders this! You'll be lucky if someone doesn't ship you back to Texas, in a cat carrier, for this!<BR/><BR/><BR/>You managed to redeem yourself, somewhat, with your brilliant discussion about weddings in modern society. And I'm not saying it's brilliant just because you agree with me. I'm saying this because it's true. <BR/><BR/>What is with this tiara trend, anyway? I haven't seen this myself, but seriously, What The Fuck? If I spot some woman doing this I'm going to wet myself laughing at her.Laura Elizabethhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18097043270243212897noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16010478.post-1155651568766523152006-08-15T07:19:00.000-07:002006-08-15T07:19:00.000-07:00When I first moved to Eastern Texas, in contrast, ...<I>When I first moved to Eastern Texas, in contrast, again and again I heard, “Well, the great thing about being an academic here is that you can leave during the summers and winter holiday.”</I><BR/><BR/>A-men, brother GayProf. This is what I hate most about where I now live: the fact that OTHER people (who live here) seem to hate it so much. It's so depressing to be around that all the time, and takes so much psychic eneregy to resist.<BR/><BR/>I love Boston. I miss Boston. I am absurdly, absurdly jealous of you right now. You're lucky you're a nice person; otherwise I might start to hate you in all my envy. <BR/><BR/>Oh, dude, my word veri is "poopd"! Makes my day.Margarethttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03047700345491098393noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16010478.post-1155642027008450522006-08-15T04:40:00.000-07:002006-08-15T04:40:00.000-07:00So many brilliant observations in this piece. My f...So many brilliant observations in this piece. My favorite is the contrast between conversations in Boston and Texas. <BR/><BR/>Oh, and mocking the tiara girls- priceless.tornwordohttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16581361982939423598noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16010478.post-1155640564003136262006-08-15T04:16:00.000-07:002006-08-15T04:16:00.000-07:00Welcome to Boston...I'm just north of the city fou...Welcome to Boston...I'm just north of the city found your Blog by way of Larry's Love Lemming. I'm going to have to come back and peruse some more. You sound very interesting. <BR/><BR/>Rick<BR/><A HREF="http://www.bandittalks.blogspot.com/" REL="nofollow">Bandit Talks</A>Rick Bettencourthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10864282234769831038noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16010478.post-1155637494992094912006-08-15T03:24:00.000-07:002006-08-15T03:24:00.000-07:00My problem with weddings, as opposed to marriage, ...My problem with weddings, as opposed to marriage, is that people seem to obsess with the first to the exclusion that it is supposed to lead to the second. I happen to be pro-marriage, for those who find the right person, but weddings give me the hives.<BR/><BR/>And while there is a point in a relationship where getting married, or breaking up, is the logical next step, if ya don't feel it, ya don''t do it, as you've undoubtedly learned. <BR/>The greatest relationship advice I know comes from the movie Annie Hall, when Alvy Singer says: "A relationship is like a shark; it has to move forward, or it dies. What we have here is a dead shark."Roger Owen Greenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05298172138307632062noreply@blogger.com