There is nothing to do but simply keep working on it. I am committed to this project and won’t let it go. At some point, it will come to an end. Or I will come to an end. Whichever.
As I am zoning out staring at the computer screen, though, I often think of the many other things that I would rather be doing. Here is a brief list of some of those things:
*Have serious dental work done.
*Wonder if I will ever get to work on my research project on porn.
*Wonder if I will be taken seriously as a scholar when I start my research project on porn.
*Wonder if I will care if I am taken seriously as a scholar when I start my research project on porn.
*Think I should just watch more porn regardless.
*Mop my basement floor.
*Learn another language.
*Learn to spell in any language, even (especially?) English.
*Watch the third season of That Girl on DVD.
*Try to come up with scenarios where people would be inclined to refer to me as "That Guy."
*Read the faculty handbook for my new university.
*See if I really could sew an outfit out of a roll of Bounty© towels and a sock.
*Work on the never-ending-research-project-of-doom. Oh, wait -- That is what I am avoiding. Sometimes I get confused.
*Design a GayProf action figure (with Kung-Fu Grip!).
*Contemplate if I would look better as a red head.
*Apply for tax-exempt status as my own religion.
*Scrub my kitchen sink.
*Scrub your kitchen sink.
*Consider if I will simply retire if they ever stop manufacturing WordPerfect. Seriously, I tried using the newest version of MSWord before they installed WordPerfect on my work computer. What a pile of junk that thing is! I didn’t think that they could actually make the program worse, but they found a way! VUBOQ, can I hear an amen? I know WordPerfect dates me (I was a secretary in the early nineties after all), but it really is better if you ever want to work on really lengthy projects.
*Read the many horror stories about WordPerfect destroying somebody’s term paper/dissertation/manuscript/life that I will likely receive when people read the above line.
*Go grocery shopping.
*Pretend like I have time to plan a party over the next couple of weeks.
*Perform a blood sacrifice.
*Say to myself that I see the light at the end of the tunnel.
*Try not to imagine that light attached to a speeding train heading toward me.
*Get much needed therapy.
*Write (again) to the local place where I wanted to volunteer to see if they actually got my first message(s).
*Realize that phoning is probably still best for such things (though I personally hate the phone).
*Consider putting my cat on a diet. I didn’t think that he was heavy, but every person who has seen him since I moved to Midwestern Funky Town has commented on his relative girth.
*Search for random Zorro items on e-bay.
*Join the Navy or priesthood. Given the amount of time that I am working, it’s probably the same schedule – only those other professions come with much more guaranteed gay sex. It’s like a signing bonus or something.
*Write a hate letter to the Ugg Boot Company – again.
*Donate to a local charity shop the two boxes of crap that I lugged with me from Boston only to discover that I didn’t really need any of it.
*Go to the gym.
*Spend time giving thanks to the goddess that my new office is on the “good side” of the building with a view of trees (as opposed to the poor souls on the other side who have a view of a flat tar-paper roof top).