Thursday, April 23, 2009

Never Get GayProf Wet or Feed Him After Midnight

I've been busy. Not busy in painful ways, but busy enough to set aside my blogging duties. I know -- The blogosphere feels so empty without me.

My mother came to visit, which required the usual ritual cleaning before hand. Then, of course, we spent several days on the road touring forgotten Midwestern cities (Have I mentioned that the rest of the U.S. should feel profound shame at their blatant disregard for this region?). We did make a stop at Chrysler -- I think that they were giving away stock as a gift with the purchase of Diet Coke. You know it's a bad sign when a company has to turn to Fiat in a hope to improve quality and management decisions.

Now I am departing for my version of Paradise Island -- Which isn't really an island at all. Actually, it's totally landlocked. But it is the source of my strange and mysterious powers.

Sure, I've some ideas for posts. But, instead, I thought that you all would like to know some new things about me:

Ten Top Trivia Tips about GayProf!

    1. GayProf will often glow under UV light!
    2. GayProf was originally called Cheerioats.
    3. Michelangelo finished his great statue of GayProf in 1504, after eighteen months work!
    4. GayProf can pollinate up to six times more efficiently than the honeybee.
    5. It is bad luck to light three cigarettes with the same Gay Prof!
    6. GayProf was first discovered by Alexander the Great in India, and introduced to Europe on his return!
    7. If GayProf was life size, he would stand 7 ft 2 inches tall and have a neck twice the size of a human!
    8. New Zealand was the first place to allow GayProf to vote.
    9. A chimpanzee can learn to recognize itself in a mirror, but GayProf can not.
    10. The GayProf-fighting market in the Philippines is huge - several thousand GayProf-fights take place there every day.

Make your own trivia here (HT: Acadamnit (and probably others)).


pacalaga said...

Zip on in to GarduƱos and have some green chile cheese enchiladas for me.
Is there a hive of GayProfs out there somewhere? Cuz that would be AWESOME.

Mel said...

Blog fodder, hooray!

Be careful not to get any of that carpet dust in your eye, m'kay?

Roger Owen Green said...

been missing you - glad you're ok

vuboq said...

GayProf could totally pollinate me anytime!

I hope your Ritual Cleaning satisfied the Maternal Unit (My MU was not pleased by my cleaning abilities. *sigh*).

Have fun on Landlocked Paradise Island!


vuboq said...

Oh, and I just did the trivia thing. This was the only interesting one:

While performing her duties as queen, Cleopatra sometimes dressed up as VUBOQ.

That is so true.

susurro said...

enjoy the enchantment :D

(I've done the trivia thing twice and twice it involved sentences involving violation which made me wonder disgustedly about the gender politics. sorry . . .)

historiann said...

GayProf, I'm so glad that you and your mother are enjoying my ancestral homeland. We two are exiles from our peoples in each others' lands! (Or, well, kinda nearby.)

I'm completely unsurprised that Michaelangelo was so taken with you that he completed a statue of you more than 500 years ago. And I'm sooooooo envious!

Steven said...

Here's to the ever-approaching end of the semester with a summer to enjoy. Have a fantabulous time in "Landlocked Paradise."

Anonymous said...

Crap. I've used Gayprof to light 2 cigarettes, and now I'm starting to jones for the next one...

Earl Cootie said...

So when you GayProf sees himself in a mirror, does he want to rumble or does he feel amorous?

tornwordo said...

Hope you have a wonderful time wherever you go. Then please come back and do another post. I'll check out my trivia now.

David said...

Hat's off to the skill of Michelangelo. You don't look a day over 500.

Roger Owen Green said...

GP= On the Business librarians listserv, someone asked about Latin american-related internet sites. you may know all about these, but FWIW:

Caribbean Epediomology Centre (CAREC)
The Digital Library of the Caribbean (DLOC) Created and administered by 5
Caribbean and 4 U.S. academic and government institutions (Archives Nationales d'Haiti,
Caribbean Community (CARICOM), FundaciĆ³n Global Desarrollo y Democracia (Dominican
Republic), National Library of Jamaica, Universidad de Oriente
(Venezuela), Florida
International University, University of Central Florida, University of Florida,
University of the Virgin Islands), this website provides access to news,
and images about and from the Caribbean.

Homeland Security Digital Library (listed in databases on FSU libraries

Latin American Network Information Center (LANIC) Adminsitered by the
University of
Texas Austin, provides access to official (government), scholarly, and popular internet portals to information on Latin America for virtually every subject
available. For example, the main menu on the homnepage features links to
Economy, Education, Government, Humanities, Internet & Computing,
Libraries and
Reference, Media and Communication, Recreation, Regional Resources,
Science, Social
Sciences, Society and Culture, Sustainable Development.

The site also has special collections accessible on the left-hand side
menu of the
homepage, including: - LAGDA Gov Docs Archive (full-text versions of official
documents and video and audio recordings of key regional leaders) – can
browse by
country - LAOAP Open Archives Portal (Collaborative Project between Latin
Americanist Research Resources Project - LARRP and LANIC, to improve
access to
social sciences grey literature produced in Latin America.) - LAPTOC Latin
Periodicals Tables of Contents (LAPTOC: Tables of Contents for different
journals –
can browse list of journal titles by country and link to Tables of
Contents) -
Electoral Observatory (reports on latest elections – news, overseeing
agencies) -
TILAN Networking Trends (resource center that seeks to document trends
expansion of the Internet throughout the countries of Latin America.
Includes full
text of research reports and articles; statistics: tables containing data
on a
variety of indicators typically sought by individuals interested in
Internet growth
in Latin America; summaries of basic networking statistics and key
resources for
further information for each Latin American country; subject directory of
links to
related resources throughout the Web - Zapatistas! - Etext Collection
papers from Teresa Lozano Long Institute of Latin American Studies, Latin
Studies Association, Association for the Study of Cuban Economy, Presidential
Messages, The Sustainable Development Reporting Project (year-long
endeavor to look
at the most promising and important sustainable development programs in
America, made possible by a grant from the Mexico City office of the Ford
Foundation), Individual books, theses, papers, and other publications
hosted as part
of the Etext Collection - Castro Speech Database

Library of Congress

The Mapas Project

Housed at the University of Oregon, The Mapas Project has as its focus the
digitization and study of colonial Mesoamerican pictorial manuscripts. The
"mapa" was used loosely in New Spain to refer to pictorials that may or
may not have
had a cartographic dimension, but often showed the territories or
landscapes of
indigenous communities.

Pan American Health Organization (PAHO)

United Nations Economic Commission for Latin America and the Caribbean

Can search by links on homepage or search box. Has access to publications,
on UN programs, statistics, and unpublished studies of political and economic
issues. Random examples include studies on family planning, trade law,
drugs, and the collective action of indigenous peoples

University of New Mexico’s Latin American (newspaper) databaseAllows one
to search
news from different regions through: SourceMex (Mexico), NotiCen (formerly
EcoCentral) (Central America), NotiSur (South America), CubaSource (Cuba)

Virtual Health Library for Latin America and the Caribbean and its search

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